Thursday, November 22, 2012

Waving the white flag..

Don't get me wrong, I'm so so grateful to be pregnant again.. but holy hell, this PGAL brain sucks BIG CAJONES.
The first day I try not POAS, I panic and think the sore nipples are no longer sore.. and this backache- impending miscarriage and doom? Or just from peeling and cutting 11 apples while bent over a garbage pail?
Waving the white flag, I watched with a sigh of relief as the wondfo showed me what I wanted..
And reminded myself that Tuesday's beta results were an awesome 1873, which gives me a doubling time of just about 34 hours..

But that appointment, two weeks from today, seems as far away as an oasis mirage to a parched man in the desert - it feels like it'll never be here.. and you know what sucks? A good appointment will appease a PGAL brain for only about 24 hours..

Because you know tragedy can strike within even minutes of seeing a reassuring heart flicker, and your next appointment, when you discover said tragedy, is weeks away.. so - would you rather find out the second "It" happens, or would you rather be able to "still be pregnant" for the last few weeks...

Today? I'm pregnant, and I love my baby. And I'm going to stuff my face in thanks for everything I have this year.

Happy Thanksgiving

1 comment:

  1. I POAS every day right up to about 24 weeks I knew it wouldn't be able to tell me anything at that stage but there was something so comforting about seeing the line every morning.

    Congrats on your pregnancy, I hope it is all smooth sailing from here