Tuesday, September 20, 2016

IN&Out Day

One more look back - 39 weeks ago, Ms. Mack was at 39weeks gestation and was ready to come into the world!

Today is Ms. Mack's In&Out Day!!!

(In&Out Day, which makes me think of burgers, mmmmm, is the day that Ms. Mack has been "on the outside" for as long as she was "on the inside" - check out Ben's here!)

Friday, September 16, 2016


My grandparents were here last weekend for two nights, on their way through as they drove from Texas to Maine... (yes, DROVE... they are 81 and 79, and because my grandfather spent decades as a pilot for a commercial airlines, he hates refuses to fly as a passenger, and so - they. drive.)

They had such a good time with the kiddos (first time meeting Ms. Mack!) and it was the first quiet night (E was out of town watching the rocket launch in Florida) and the kids had just gone to bed - so we sat on the couch with a few glasses a bottle of wine, and talked - about my sister and her pending divorce (OMG have I told you guys about that?!) and about breastfeeding (my mom, her daughter, breastfed 3 babies - my grandmother breastfed a bit here and there amongst 5 babies...) and then (somehow) we talked about E's aunt who works in obstetrics, and told me recently that she had a patient come Thursday before Labor Day and had "fetal demise" - had to deliver her baby stillborn...

And then my grandmother, an only child, told me that her mother (forever and always formally called "Mother," as her generation was raised so...) - she told me that my great-grandmother had a stillborn before delivering her baby daughter... a little boy born silently into this world...

It was my first time in 31 years hearing that my grandmother was not an only child... and hearing it now as a mother myself, my heart broke for a loss that happened decades ago, the same as it broke when the ultrasound tech at The Appointment shared with me about her 5-month-pregnancy loss, that happened 20+ years ago...

These women (and soooo many others) carry their losses with them for life - and I am so grateful for the women I've met who so graciously shared their stories, mostly, I think, as reassurance and empathy after my miscarriage... as a "you are not alone" arm around the shoulders:

A hug from our across-the-street-neighbor, a woman with three grown boys, who had a miscarriage between each and every pregnancy...

A comforting squeeze from a friend of my SIL - who I can even remember seeing with her husband at a summer party just a few days/weeks after their miscarriage (also around 12 weeks, if I remember correctly) wondering, not having any idea, how they could feel, and be at a party... how I wondered what to say - act is if it never happened? - I know now... (hopefully I gave her a good squeeze, and stuck to the I'm so sorry...)

So much love from my MIL, who had a miscarriage, followed by her third child, a sweet baby boy, who didn't see his first birthday, after a fight with childhood leukemia (I still find I remind myself of that - this woman, who can sometimes seem so ditsy and loopy, has suffered through burying her child YEARS before someone "should" be buried...)

I don't always remember to remember dates from my first ill-fated pregnancy - the date of loss passing quickly in a blur of calendar days crossed off work-week by work-week... or the due date that, should "everything have gone to plan," we could expect to head off to the hospital and meet our new little...

This November 30th will mark the 4th year that the date came and went... the first year I was so grateful, but fraught with nerves as I marked "34 weeks left!",  to be expecting a new little sweet pea. The next year, life didn't even pause, as we traveled cross-country with our adorable 4-month-old Button... and the third year? even busier - in fact, too busy to blog, so Halloween (daycare parties to bake for, costumes to shop for, pumpkins to carve) wasn't posted on until December!
(I guess it's another look-back post... lol)

All that to say, this year will most likely be similar - we'll be just past a flurry of Thanksgiving festivities: fighting with homemade lattice-work crusts for the in-high-demand-by-FIL apple-pie, trying to keep over-zealous in-laws from feeding Ms. Mack food in sizes/chunks she's not ready for yet (but might be soon! First tooth breaking through any hour now!) and glutton-ing ourselves until we're too full to do anything but loll in front of the TV...

some famous quote - If you are constantly looking back, you're going to miss what's right in front of you... (or something like that! you get the sentiment!)
I guess I've been doing a decent job of looking forward, and not back...

Just like the women who shared with me, I will be busy with life, and my living children, the day-to-day banality of work, dogs, chores and hobbies; yet every once in awhile, I'll give myself a squeeze, think of the ultrasound picture tucked away in my nightstand, and toss up an I'll love you forever! to the sky, letting it float off my finger tips, before I turn and help Button wipe his tush once more... (ha!)

Thursday, September 15, 2016

copy-cat look-back

Because I'm bored at work (boss is out today and tomorrow...) and should not, under any circumstances be buying more LuLaRoe (it starts with staying off the BuySellTrade page!!! and - well, I bought another Cassie and a pair of leggings last night.... -_- ) I'm instead blogging...

A cool look back, at this time one year ago (to be exact, September 14, 2015) when I was 25 weeks pregnant with little Ms. Mack, wondering if she would, like her big brother, also make her entrance to the world with no regard to schedules and appointments (yup!)

And then, at this time two years ago (September 15, 2014) when I was enjoying what I thought was a crazy- and fun-filled life (oh past-K, wait til you have two kids!) with a 14-month-old, saying/hearing things I never thought I'd say/hear (like "Button, get your fingers out of the dog's eyeballs!")

Even farther back, three years ago - I apparently was too crazy in September of 2013 to post anything - I guess having a 2 month old can do that to you... my return to blogger-existence finally came on October 3, 2013 when I word-vomited how I became an Exclusive Pumper and told tales of our trip into NYC to visit a neurologist to make sure Button's funny-little egg-head was just that, a funny shape, and not anything more serious that may require a helmet (it wasn't - no helmet, and a fabulous dome now on top of Button's shoulders!)

And whole four years ago (holy cow... FOUR YEARS?! I've been revealing details of my life (like when E learned about menstrual cycles?!) for over four years?!) - a whole four years ago, I was two months into TTCAL (and one cycle away from Button's conception, little did I know) and was desperate for a peek into the future...

I couldn't even have dreamed back then where I'd be in four years - yet here I am, September 15, 2016 one day away from a weekend with no plans - a weekend to spend all day(s) with my two babies...

Happy almost-Friday!

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Balancing Mom Hacks...

Listen - you've gotten find balance in life... and I feel like I've finally found/accepted that in the last few weeks...

like Monday evening after I got home with the kiddos and we were waiting for Daddy to get home from work - some nights I would plop Ms. Mack in the highchair with some puffs, and Button would get into all kinds of crap play in the living room while I cleaned up the kitchen a little and got dinner going...

instead, that night, we had a rocking dance party...
the play list?
"I Like to Move It (Move It)" 

and "Everybody Dance Now" by C&C Music factory

 and "Who Let the Dogs Out"

let's just say my white girl moves totally came out...

and I totally attempted this...

(and boy, Button went down for bed later like a DREAM... we were all worn out!)

But really - I've accepted that clean clothes will sit in folded piles (eventually I go through them and they're all in the hamper again anyways!) in favor of reading the second Outlander book (or watching another episode!)

Or the dishes in the sink will sit for one more day in favor of crocheting another square for Ms. Mack's blanket (my goal is to have it finished by Christmas... with over 2 seasons of Outlander to watch, it shouldn't be hard!)

Balance - work hard (from the hours of 9-5 and then some (at home), of course) and play hard!

Some other Mom Hacks that can help you find balance (or just help you do the fun stuff and skip the work part!):

1. If you're like me and become a whirling tasmanian devil during the get-ready-for-work/daycare morning craziness, a good time-saving tip was to send Ms. Mack to daycare in her PJs... hear me out - the night before, just dress baby in a clean onesie and pants that can pass for clothes...
The next morning, you can go straight to daycare after a diaper change!

2. (stealing from the internet) trying to get the house cleaned in the 5 minutes you have before family comes over??

3. speaking of baskets... BUY ALL THE BASKETS (like when Michaels has a sale!!) It makes the tornado-clean-up so much easier... we have a basket for little boy toys, a basket for little girl toys, a basket for big Daddy shoes, a basket for Mommy shoes, a basket for - you get the idea, right?

4. A recently discovered one: scrub your tub while giving baths - you're already in there on your hands and knees - have Daddy take the clean kiddos and do a really quick scrub!

Friday, September 9, 2016

Wardrobe update...

because, well .... I bought some more LLR...

like, 5 more pieces... yes. in one week...

This is it though... no more... (I already feel the "BUY BUY BUY" urge dying away, accepting that when someone else snagged the $10 EUC leggings (TEN FRIGGIN DOLLARS... biotch) just 1 minute before I posted, that it wasn't meant to be - a sign from the LLR Gods that I have BOUGHT.. E.. NUFF.

So, what did I buy?

Well... I spotted these really cute XOXO Valentine leggings, but they had been sold via private message on (TheFacePage) and I was all, "I officially have a unicorn*!"
(*a unicorn is a LLR term for someone's GOTTA-HAVE-THAT item, whether leggings, dress or shirt, in a certain pattern)
So I posted in the B/S/T group about it, and within minutes someone had told me they have the XOXO leggings - and who would it be but the girl I bought my Madison from! She sold them to me for just $22 shipped - they're BrandNewWithTags as you can see!
These pretty gals should be arriving in the mail today!

And then there was a cute Aztec-sleeved Randy (baseball-T) that I snagged about two weeks ago, that there was a miscommunication/misspelling for invoicing/paypal payment that finally got squared away (no picture, it was too long ago that I commented sold, I couldn't find the post!) and that, too, should be arriving any day (oh boy, I can only imagine the mail waiting at the house... lol) I got this for only $17 shipped!

And speaking of fun fall Aztec prints, I found EUC (excellent used condition) leggings for only $12 shipped!

Couldn't pass those up at all!!

I can already picture these with over-the-knee light brown boots, and a big oversize cream cable knit sweater...

too bad it's still in the 90's this week!!!

During another clearance sale somewhere I snagged a solid teal Cassie for only $14 shipped!!
will go with everything! 
ooo but I just envisioned a tucked-in chambray... 

and another one I'm excited for this fall: a solid burgundy Azure (for just $19 shipped!) that I could tell was getting close to selling (three others quickly posted "next" after I claimed it!)
The Azure is a great light cotton A-line twirly-swirly skirt with a fold over waist that can totally be pulled up high over a tank and belted with boots, or worn low and over the knee

And really, I only bought all this (after I said I was done) because I sold a bunch:
my teal with yellow arrows Cassie, the black lacy Cassie went in a package deal with the large Julia... I got an offer and sold the B&W polka dot Cassie I had been debating on (made $7 on it!) and am also awaiting the exchanged Irma-for-ClassicT!

I also sold (last night!) the royal blue Nicole - except, lost $4 in the deal - I just ran out at lunch to the post office and shipped it, damn the textured Nicole weights alot... cost over $9 to ship!!! UGH

So, that's it... no more buying unless it's CHEAP - like, wholesale prices - and something I already have matching accessories/articles and can make multiple outfits with!

I also bagged up a huge amount of regular and maternity clothes to try to sell to thredUP... I figured it's stuff I was getting rid of anyways, even if it gets me $30 for the whole bag (there's alot there!) hey, why not?

I've also sold about $60 worth of maternity clothes, and have someone coming this weekend to check out a set lot of Ms. Mack's 3-6M clothes (a momma who is due this winter! maybe we can make the season sales a regular thing as the babes both grow! lol)

Now - I was up late last night (1am!!!) cleaning house because my grandparents are rolling into town to stay two nights with us - E has been in FL since Wednesday to catch last night's rocket launch with his dad, and will return tomorrow midday...
so I'm a bit tired, and need to snap to it and hopefully leave work a little early today to have just a bit of a breather before the G'rents arrive (my grandfather is very punctual, having been a commercial airline pilot for years and will no doubt have his arrival timed to the minute, pulling up in front of my house at the 5:30 time I mentioned to them two weeks ago as the time I get home from wrok...)

Happy Friday!!