You know - your ever watchful eye is on a constant roam, looking for girlfriends - heck or even just female strangers - that are sipping gingerale and cranberry juice while the rest of their girls' night posse is toasting with martinis.
You note, and then pore over and inspect, the bathroom schedule of your coworker, wondering why she just peed three times in the last hour.
You get suspicious when a female family member under the age of 40 passes on the sushi and seared-tuna appetizers - is she watching her mercury levels??
Or like me - you just know it's about your pregnant assistant when another coworker, and close friend of your assistant, asks at lunch of another mother "Did you get an amnio done?"
Or when same coworker and friend of assistant asked yesterday at lunch, "Is it bad for someone's sugar to go to ###?" (I completely forget the number, and I have no clue what's normal - so it'd be silly of me to even guess...)
And my mind goes to pregnant coworker who has diabetes. And is overweight.
It just might be a major case of Green Monster-itis that has me watching her every move.
She just spent 10 minutes in the bathroom and now seems to be sniffling. I wonder if she's spotting.
Please don't think that I'm sitting here in our office thinking, Miscarry! Miscarry! Misery loves the company!
As always, it's just an epic battle between Good & Evil.
Of course you hope for NOTHING but the best for her - don't you remember being in those early weeks, full of giddiness and wonder and awe that there was a second heartbeat inside of you?
So the fuck what. This bitch doesn't even WANT to be pregnant right now. She complains all the time about having to go to doctors' appointments, at which she probably gets an ultrasound every time for reassurance. Go ahead and wonder why she hasn't had any morning sickness yet!
Speaking of morning sickness, neither did you - I'm just saying...
You wonder who wins?!
I see-saw back and forth about the possibility of being pregnant this cycle too. Hours of phantom symptoms like nausea and dizziness first thing in the morning (had that when I was pregnant.) Followed immediately by hours of utter despair that we have to go another cycle because I am NOT pregnant.
"Only try to realize the truth..."
What truth?
"There ARE no symptoms..."
There are no symptoms?!
"Then you'll see, it is not the phantom symptoms that are crazy, it is YOU that's crazy!"
******
Eric's surprise pary is coming along well - 24 people will DEFINITELY be there. Which is probably better than any other turnouts we've had for our previous annual Palooza's. So SIL and I are meeting Saturday while E is on a rafting trip to call the caterers and chair/table rental place.
I only hope that until this party, I can pull off little white lies alot better than last night:
I purchased a dress for $50 and wasn't planning on telling E how much it was. So when he flat out asked me how much I spent?
WHAT chocolate cake?!
P365
"This, too, shall pass..."
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