The Brain has DEFINITELY left the building... (5w1d)

you know how I know The Brain has officially exited?

I started this post on Friday, and promptly forgot about it... and so, we'll mash-up the one I intended for Friday and the one I was going to do today - they both were going to be short and sweet anyways!


First thing's first - when I say the brain's left, I even mean the brain that controls my neat and precise movements...

in other words, I've become a bit of a klutz this pregnancy... I've tripped down the stairs twice (just skidded on my heels mostly), tripped UP the stairs once (which was a first! I usually slide DOWN!), fell on my ass on hardwood floor while at a friend's house (I blame the sock feet), knocked over TWO cups of hot liquid this past Sunday (coffee at home, and tea at IL's)... all in the past 12 days since I got my BFP...
 
I was always mindful of going down the stairs the past two years, because I'm frequently holding Ben, but now I'm super careful, clutching the banister the entire way down... (Good thing we got those suckers stairs carpeted last year!!!)



And you remember (I think) I've mentioned before that Zoey comes to work with me once a week? I'd been doing so good for the last few months, then I forgot to bring her last Thursday.... oops..

that same day at work I accidentally tossed my calculator in the garbage... I usually keep it on my CPU tower under my desk, to the LEFT of the desk leg.  Well instead, I just plopped it into the garbage, which is to the RIGHT of the desk leg... I've never done that in the 6.5 years I've worked here so far...



Blurbs originally intended for today:
I went to a clothing swap at a GF's yesterday - largely a success (I brought home about a third LESS than what I brought to the party!) and got a bunch of "new" tops and dresses!
At this clothing swap was my bestie Dee and fBFF... and of course, there was spiked pink lemonade, blueberry wine, and regular wine - and me not drinking is a large flashing neon sign, because I could usually handle a glass even while hung over...

so I accepted a glass of wine, "sipped it" (touched it to my lips) and during a convenient moment (everyone was busy digging through clothes!) I darted to the bathroom and dumped half the glass down the sink! (SORRY VINO GODS!!)

And while we (the three of us - me, Dee and fBFF) were trying things on in a room together, fBFF was asking Dee (who works with kids) about car seats:
    "So I plan on being pregnant by June/July this year, do you think I can use [DS]'s carseat again??"

oh, is that right? You "plan on being pregnant" and so readily assume that it will be, huh?

Don't we all wish...

(of course, in my head I was cuddling little Johnny/Janey Appleseed (5 weeks yesterday!))


And in PGAL news - I've stopped peeing on things! (as of yesterday morning...) The test line couldn't possibly get any darker (unless the control one got lighter!) and so I'm happy (enough - can't do anything else!) to now tick off the days (11 left!) until the first appointment and u/s a week from Friday...


(also - sidenote: I was just looking at "12 Breathtaking Images of Babies Right in the Middle of Being Born"  (warning, totally NSFW)
because Button was a C/S, I could have a RCS or try for a VBAC... and to be honest, I'm totally leaning toward RCS... ESPECIALLY after looking at those pictures...

because, to be brutally honest - those pictures?? (to me) BIRTH IS NOT A BEAUTIFUL THING, PHYSICALLY...

I think, at the end of my life, I would be totally fine accept that I never pushed a mini-melon out of my vagina...)

Good doesn't always win... (4w4d)

But when it (good) does win?

Rainbows and butterflies...

no, not really - but it IS nice when the good outweighs the bad...


Yesterday I took the day off of work to drive up to CT, a halfway point for myself (NJ) and my sister (MA)...

My parents are visiting her and her family this week from Texas, and no way would I let them be this close without going to see them! (And having them see Button! It's been since Christmas!)

So we all settled into a chain restauraunt (after a mad dash for us ALL to the bathroom after a 2ish hour carride - during which Button slept for the last hour - score!)

And as I knew would happen, the second we get all settled, the waiter comes around and asks for drink orders, and I watch my mom and sister out of the corner of my eye as I fumble with ordering a Mango iced-tea (I.E. NO ALCOHOL!)  ((I might as well have held up a neon scrolling sign for them...))

Except it WASN'T so obvious to the waiter, who kept trying to convince me of the fabulous-ness of their Sauza tequila margaritas and how $3.39 was SUCH A GREAT DEAL!

(random pic, again so pics in blog readers aren't pee sticks (below)...)

They all got excited (my dad a minute later when he also caught on) and I caveat-ed with a "it's still REAAALY EARLY, I haven't even seen the doctor yet..."

And then, I had to ask my mom about this bet she'd mentioned a few months ago...

Something like she and my dad had bets on who would be KTFU again first - me or SIL (the crazy one who scrapes her daughter's poop out of her diaper before throwing it away? yea that one...)

And I only brought it up to my mom because I had this weird feeling about them (BIL+SIL) and I asked - not in the "DID I WIN THE BET?!" way...

And my mom kinda sat there and looked at my dad and half smirked / half looked like she didn't know what to say...

IN OTHER WORDS, THEY'RE TOTALLY PREGNANT TOO!    (Good News!)

Aw, yay! how cute!!! We'll be pregnant together in July this summer during the family reunion!!





UNLESS.... something happens....
 (out squeaked my PGAL brain)  (Bad News!)

(OHGOD OHGOD OHGOD PLEASE don't let anything happen to this pregnancy, because if it does - I don't think I can live through SIL's this summer...)  ((remember, if it's said as an aside, in parentheses, the universe doesn't hear you!))

I just really hope and pray that both of our pregnancies continue in a healthy manor... OHPLEASE OHPLEASE...


And our first appointment is set (did it during the carride yesterday! go blue tooth!) for Friday May 8th... u/s at 9am and dr appt to follow...
15 MORE DAYS!     (Good News!)

And I can check off the first two (and only items) off this little checklist I decided was important last pregnancy:

• Keep POAS - CHECK (I even used the 2nd CB weekly digi - which has progressed to 2-3w past ovulation / 4-5w pregnant WHEW)
  
  (LOOK at that 18dpo wondfo! of course, it was still "wet" as the others have dried for days now...)        (Good News!)
• Call Dr (that old list said "ask when is the soonest they can do an u/s (even if you can't see baby/sac/fetalpole yet) to make sure it's not ectopic."     Well,I feel ok with the first appointment being 2 weeks from tomorrow... ACK! TWO WEEKS!

(I feel like my life has been lived in 2WWs the past 2 years... 2WWs during TTC, a 2ww for first u/s, another 2ww for the second u/s, a 2ww at the end of the pregnany for a scheduled (but not really - SURPRISE!) c-section...)

the PGAL-ness... 15DPO

A few weeks ago, I thought gleefully, "oh gosh! at the rate time passes now, the first few scary weeks/months of a pregnancy should fly compared to last time without a toddler for distraction!"


eh.....


I guess it somewhat has so far - considering I tested so freaking early (both good - I got to know sooner! and bad - that much longer to wait for 4w, 5w, first u/s...)
I tested at 3w2d (if you count that "IS THAT A SHADOW?!" on 9DPO) and here we are 4w1d..

I am actually not too freaking out right now PGAL-wise... I'm (of COURSE) still peeing on things... and panicked this morning a bit as I peered through the shower doors (5 minutes was up!) at the Wondfo and thought, OHMIGOD it's not that different at all than yesterday!! DAAAAAAAMMIT!

And then I started to rationalize:
- the FRER at 13DPO looked OH SO MUCH DARKER than the one just the day before... like, HELL YEA check out that second line!

- I played Guestimate the Beta, Mate!(of course with the help of this handy site which tells me that
 "Beta hCG levels usually double about every 2 days for the first four weeks of pregnancy."

So considering how early I DID* test, I figure it was, oh - 5-7miu (or is that mui?!) on Wednesday ((if you count that shadow on 9DPO "turning into" a BFP on 10DPO, that would make sense, right?))
and then on Friday it should theoretically have been around 10-14mIU... and by Sunday should have been, oh, approximately 20-28mIU.
As I finished the math (and soaping up my hair in the shower) I thought, no wonder the Wondfo is still light!!!

And then I got out of the shower and looked at it closer, and fist pumped... OH BABY it's darker than yesterday's! 


And another thing about being PGAL, so succinctly put on a Pregnant Chicken post I recently read:

"Seeing other women pregnant will still cause you to rage with jealousy. There I said it."


Yup - we were at a 3rd birthday party on Saturday (which was so annoying - upwards of 50 people there, the mom wouldn't serve cookies/cake and sing HappyBirthday until her 3-yr-old had opened all of his gifts... in front of everyone.  I'm sorry, is this a fucking baby shower or something?! THIRD BIRTHDAY!!) and at this party there was a 3-day old baby and two pregnant women 6+ months...

I wouldn't say I raged with jealousy... but I would be lying if I didn't feel the faint twinges as I rubbed their bellies...



And because it's near impossible to find a private area where I work to call my OB/GYN (I mean, consider the conversation: "Hi I'm calling because I got a POSITIVE PREGNANCY TEST a few days ago, when can I schedule the first ULTRASOUND?")  I'll hopefully be able to leave work right before 5pm and try to call and schedule an appointment... and maybe betas... because I can't make up my mind on that...


And because I want to show you how crazy I was at 9/10DPO - pee stick pictures to follow after this random one - because I don't want anyone's feeds to pop up with a pee-stick picture and the first picture of a post is always the one that pops up... how about some puppies??

And now for pee sticks, the wondfos' progression through today...


(I promise lines are much darker in person...
I realized this pic makes it look like I didn't get a true BFP until like, yesterday... lol)




(I've just started my own PGAL panic... I'll be examining these again as soon as I get home from work... SIGH)






The only thing that's somewhat sanity-saving, are these beauts:

now THAT is line progression... (you'll notice I refrained from using my last FRER on 14 & 15DPO... I might just use that last one tomorrow...)

AAAAND I have a CBdigi that does that nifty little week indicator, and should in theory (in the next few days) change from it's previous reading of "1-2 weeks" (past ovulation, so 3-4weeks pregnant) to a nice "3-4 weeks" (4-5 weeks pregnant)....

the craziness continues...

Mantras

So I recently came across these PGAL Mantras and I need them a lot right now (and probably for the new few weeks!!)

Today I am pregnant and I love my baby.

I am pregnant until someone tells me otherwise.

My past does not dictate my future. A previous m/c does not mean I will have another m/c.

Just because something sad is happening to another poster, does not mean it will happen to you. We all know m/c and complications are not contagious!

Hope does not make bad things happen" You cannot jinx your pregnancy by creating a ticker, getting excited, or telling someone. Live in the positive!

(actually, I AM TOTALLY MAKING THAT A HOMEPAGE TAB!)

With that said, I am so so so so grateful for the positivity from E right now...

Let me back  up first and tell you how the "cute tell" I had somewhat planned fell apart...

E had a dentist appointment yesterday at 5pm, so I headed to MIL's house to pick up Button.  Got there around 5:30, she tells me he ate dinner (THREE bowls of pasta!) and invites me to sit and eat. 
I think, CRAP - there goes getting home before E so I can pee on those digi's I just bought today!

But I sit down, eat some pasta, and watch E's adopted sisters play with Button in the backyard.  Around 6pm, we finally get in the car to head home - and I see a text from E that he is still in the chair waiting for the dentist to finish some "bullshit conversation in the hallway."

SWEET! I'll still get home before him! like, way before him! Now let's see.... what can I do to tell him in a "cute way"...

I get home, and I have a million bags to get in the house, Button is insisting on carrying in a Mickey doll and a toy car from my car, and there's Zoey (our min-pin who comes to work with me every Thursday to visit the residents!)

In other words,  utter chaos trying to get in the house... And then a text from E that he's on his way home, ETA 30 minutes...

I run upstairs (carrying Button basically over my shoulder) to PIAC - dip a Wondfo and a digi, and set the timers (5min and 3min respectively...)

Watch the "Pregnant" pop up on the digi (SQUEEEEEE!) and check for a second line (decent shade, considering it's late evening) on the Wondfo.

Then I decide to haul Button back downstairs (two flights!) to his playroom, to try and crack open a new paint set so he can make Daddy a picture that I'll try to "hide" somewhere the writing "Big Brother!"  Panic ensues because I couldn't get the damn paint open (seriously?!) and nearly spilled the red all over the carpet once I did get it open... faintly write "BigBrother" in blue crayon on the BACK of the picture and set it on the highchair in the kitchen - envisioning E picking it up and flipping it over (for some reason) and seeing the words...

Then I take a picture of the digi test (what's plainer than that gray-scale word!) to send him via text about a minute after he walks in the door, in case he skips over the painting...

Got bases covered, right?


WRONG

He arrives, my heart starts pounding with excitement, and nothing happens the first few minutes.  I HEAR my text come through on his phone, but he's too occupied with saying hi to and playing with Button... (COME ON! Be a bad dad once and check your phone!!!)

I point out the "painting" - which he does look at the back, but assumed his sisters helped Button paint and, well - he (E) is their "Big Brother" - FACE PALM!!!

Then he FINALLY picks up his phone, only to glance at it (probably sees it's just a text from me) and then plugs it in without another glance.

 SERIOUSLY?!?!?

At this point I'm about to collapse with anxiety/nerves/excitement... I am trying to be nonchalant, wandering around the house, wiping the stove, putting a dish in the dishwasher, waiting for him to discover SOMETHING...

I finally decided to just go upstairs (get a full laundry basket of dirty clothes) and bring him the actual damn digi test... and said, "Since you didn't quite get the message on the picture, and won't check your phone, HERE!!!!" (but not in a really mean way. lol)


And - aw man, he was so excited =)

and tossed Button and shouted, "You're gonna be a big brother!!!! Do you want a baby?!" (to which Button replied, "Yea!" meltsmyheart)

All this to say - E is so excited, and so positive about it - and I need the positivity, because my mind still can't help but add on the caveat "If everything works out ok..."

And he tells me, he doesn't "want to do the secrecy thing this time, because it's the second one" and I am totally on board with that because, (I CANT HELP IT DAMMIT)
 "if shit hits the fan" - I want people - family, my bestie Dee, etc - to know what was, and what happened...

Of course, I still want to wait until after the first doctor appointment (more importantly the first u/s to see/hear a hb!) which I'm hoping I can schedule the week before Mother's Day and we can tell the Grandmas the great news on their day!



Big Breath:         Today I am pregnant and I love my baby.

More craziness... 11DPO

this was my morning so far:

woke up 1+ hour earlier than normal... decided to temp, then decided mid-temp-taking NOT TO BE CRAZY and took BBT out.

Decided 1 minute later to temp...

98.1

still nice and high... (which means what exactly, K!?)


Quietly get up, PIAC and dip some Wondfo.

During the 5 minute wait, go and get Button up - while his overnight diaper is LOADED, his PJs are dry - WIN!

Change him, check the time - 2 minutes left...

We read a book (he flips the pages and points to the apples and monkeys...)

it's time...

There's still a second line, it's faint - let me grab yesterday morning's test!

It's slightly darker - in the sense that 10DPO was still a bit of a squinter, and 11DPO is easily visible to the non-squinting naked eye...

Hide test in bathroom jewelry case... because I STILL haven't told E...

Think to myself, I know I said last night that I would tell him this morning after getting a nice reassuring 2nd line - but it's still lighter than I like (but definitely slightly darker than yesterday) so maybe I'll run out at lunch and pick up some digi's and more FRERs (OH! I still have that one in the bottom drawer! maybe I'll use it this afternoon!)

Once at work, I pore over that beta site - hm the "median" ((is that average?!)) betas at 10DPO are 43, but wait - the "median" at 11DPO is only 34... STUPID WEBSITE! and what does that mean in reference to what my beta might possibly be? I wonder if I should call the dr at lunch and be that crazy lady asking for betas...

Then I remote connect to my home computer and stare at pictures of previous BFPs at 11DPO (first being from MMC and second being from Button's pregnancy...)
AH yea, ok - see, that one is just as light as today's!!! but - I tried to take a pic of today's on my phone and the second line didn't register... but I KNOW it's so dark enough to see at first glance in person... WHAT IF IT ISN'T AS DARK AS PREVIOUS TESTS ON 11DPO?!



Welcome to crazy-town... it just got crazier

A Confession...

First off, I almost died Monday night...
well, more figuratively than literally (although it was damn close).

Gas cramps (those ones high up in your ribs? and you feel like a good burp or fart will fix them all?) started Monday at work right after lunch, and got so bad by 4pm I could barely sit up, so I went home (drove myself, was horrible...)
cramps continued, I consulted with Dr. Google (bowel obstruction! GONNA NEED SURGERY!) and my MIL (who's been an endoscopy nurse for years - poop is her business!) she guessed it was viral, and I would eventually vomit or have diarrhea. (YES! At that point, I would take anything if it meant the cramps would stop...)

Finally, while E was putting Button to sleep, I threw up.  AND HALLELUJAH the cramps had stopped... I was able to sit up and walk again, and so devoured dinner (albeit a slightly smaller than usual dinner). 

Went to bed around 11 as usual (even read a bit before!) and somehow woke up around 12:30 - can't remember if it was cramps or nausea that woke me, but I began vomiting again... after the first bout, I tried to lay back down in bed only to be overcome with nausea 20-30 minutes later...
Lather, Rinse & Repeat one more time, and I decided to camp out on the bathroom floor...

I knew I would need two plush robes eventually! One served as a pillow, the other a blanket... 2-3 more bouts of nearly dry-heaving (not much left in the tummy at this point...) and E came in with a damp wash cloth (heaven!) and to see if I was still alive (barely)...

I felt bad I was keeping him up (it was 3:30 at this point) so I had him help me get downstairs to the couch and prepare a bucket (popcorn bowl... now currently soaking with bleach and hot water).  That set up saw me dry heave and lamely line the bucket with gross bile...
(And Button woke up... so now E was dealing with a sick wife and a fussing toddler - who he ended up bringing to bed with him, and they proceeded to lay awake for about 45 minutes before Button finally passed out...)
I didn't get relief until about 5am, when I thankfully passed out...

That was the last of the vomiting, and miraculously - I had my appetite back by around 7:30 that morning when E brought me buttered toast and a banana (which I devoured...)

so - time for the confession...


Maybe it was the ravenous hunger I had (ok, toast and a banana filled me, but still) immediately following violent vomiting...

But something made me test that day, with horribly yellow/orange (hello! so dehydrated!) somewhat-first-morning-urine...

It was 9DPO, so don't ask - I have no idea what I was thinking

And in fact, it looked negative to me at the end of the 5 minutes (and why shouldn't it? AT NINE DPO!) 

So I set it aside, thinking I'd be a horrible cheat and look at it again in an hour... because that's what happens when you're crazy...


but guys.... a few hours later?


I got a "holy-shit-I'm-totally-seeing-things" second line...
a line that I had to twist and hold the pee stick to the sunlight and squint and could only see for a second before I didn't see it anymore... (which also makes me totally crazy, because that far outside the time limit SO DOESN'T COUNT!)

But..
Then I tested again this morning...
and saw a faint (but don't have to squint at all!) second line...
(and totally within the 5 minutes!!!!)



I haven't even told E yet...


ohmigod ohmigod ohmigod....


please be sticky...

might as well....

go all the way crazy, right?
(I'm talking crazy, like - I'm even chart-stalking myself for the cycle when I got pregnant with Button... apparently had a "gonna-vom-or-eat-my-left-arm" when I woke up in the mornings)

symptoms at 8DPO:

here we go...
1 - woke up with a feeling of low-blood-sugar /slash/ haven't-eaten-for-hours-NEED-FOOD.
    so there's that.

2 - I've been writing in a "DPO-Diary" (an unpublished blogger post. lol) that I feel "somewhat fatigued"
like last night, when I sat my ass down on the couch as soon as Button was in bed, and didn't move for hours.  and it's most likely because I had spent the entire day doing sidewalk chalk, swinging, riding our power-wheels quad and generally playing outside in between trips to Kmart and the grocery store and H&R Block to sign tax returns that E was working on with them... so yea, a good reason to be tired at the end of a busy Sunday.

3 - I also wrote "somewhat frequent peeing"
very ambiguous, right?
I mean - I peed three times by the time lunch came Friday, and was all - I definitely didn't drink more water than usual! and I usually don't pee once until lunch time!
but there is no getting up MOTN to pee.
(apparently, Button's BFP cycle I didn't really wake up before "usual morning time" to pee until 11DPO.)

((I told you I'm crazy, sitting here comparing each DPO to Button's cycle.))

4 - I went to jump with Button in the kitchen yesterday and upon the first jump, thought "OW my boobs!"
And I'm sure you're all, "silly girl - what woman WOULDN'T feel some pain in their boobs when they jump??"
This girl... because ever since I stopped pumping, the ladies have been riding in a cool A cup. (barely.)
so, add to the list "somewhat sensitive nipps and somewhat sore boobs"

5 - how about a "somewhat" elevated sense of smell?? I noticed (which I don't usually of course) E's rank morning breath all weekend... and it's like the cup of oatmeal (cooled off now) that is currently on my desk is still sending out scent-smoke-signals that make it seem like I'm sitting in a factory in the middle of the cookie-making-shift...

5 - am I not really PMSing like usual? "Usual" being that the full calendar week before AF I'm a total raging bitch (mostly to E - I can't really let it fly at work.  even though I do sometimes... lol)
so - I am somewhat not as bitchy as usual PMS...


really convincing, right?


ADDED after publishing:
  for posterity (and for Next(IfThere'sANext) Cycle so I can look back and say, NOPE not PG symptoms!)
I can't forget to mention frequent pooping.
YUP.
I'm "usually" (there's that word again) an every-three-or-so-days kinda gal.  How about once a day from Thursday through yesterday... (and slightly constipation-type poop...)
also can't forget to mention - as of this morning I'm noticing the getting winded from things like climbing stairs (which normally don't "Wind" me...)
/end of update.

I tell myself I won't test any earlier than 11DPO, but then I see beta charts like this one and read (and re-read) sites like this for the sensitivity of wondfos (sites say anywhere from 10-25miu) vs FRERs (again, I've seen posts indicate anywhere from 10-25miu) and I'm like, TOTALLY TESTING TOMORROW!! (only 9DPO. lol)

And then I tell myself just wait it out and continue temping - will it stay up?? will it plummet?!

who wouldn't agree, a plummeting temp is a LITTLE bit easier to see than a glaring single line...

And hence the title.  Might as well go balls-to-the-wall-crazy, right?

quick blurb...

it's Friday.

And not "Foodie Friday" because I get to bring home 2 containers from a luncheon at work, thus saving me from having* to cook...

*And I actually really resent this lately - E gets to be the "friend" to Button and play outside and goof off after work/daycare while I'm the "parent" - cooking dinner, cleaning the kitchen, doing laundry (if I waited until after Button was in bed, it would never get done.  I'm too tired to do much at that point...) 

Anyways.


Other news: 5DPO.

I'm already symptom spotting...

*slaps own wrist* STOP IT!!!

hopefully the weekend (and first 4 days of next week!) passes quickly - my intentions are to hold out until 11DPO (Thursday) to test...

Weekend at least should go pretty quickly as we have a christening for Dee's son tomorrow (I really hope it doesn't interfere with Button's nap time, but I have a feeling it, of course, will...)


I'll be counting down the next 55 minutes until the work day ends - and then I'll be stopping for some hard ciders.

'Cuz it is only 5DPO...



right?

Talk about Awesome...

So we use G-oogle drive for automatic backup of our phones and pictures (i.e. every picture we ever take of Button is on our cell phones, so we set them up to auto-backup on G.oogle!)

They have this thing they call Auto-Awesome, where it processes your pictures and video clips and makes really cool things out of them!

It will recognize a number of similar photos and 1 - creates collages (of course it's something I do frequently on a site called pic*monkey, but this program does it automatically!!)

 (oh my gosh please don't judge me for the horrible haircut and uneven bangs he used to have... such an awful look. but we all need those at one point in our lives, don't we? to be able to look back and laugh? LOL)

It will also, based on recognizing similar photos, 2 - create GIFs:

 
I actually just found this one in my AutoAwesome folder:

I mean - it's kinda weird for it to be "snowing" while it's so sunny and bright out, but *shrugs* oh well...

And their videos? How do they do it?!

Yea.  

My kid licked the dishwasher.

the whole point of me crushing on Auto Awesome is this:

Button and his beautiful new (but cold!) girlfriend at the local library...
And the visit there was actually prompted by his passport application because...

WE'RE GOING TO CANCUN!!!

Apparently, the last few trips we've taken (Poconos last April with family, Texas at Christmas, etc) don't really count as "true vacations" according to E...

and he's been jonesing for a "True Vacation" and so, it's now official (booked on Tuesday night!) that in (checks phone countdown widget) 41 days, we fly to Cancun for 5 nights at an all-inclusive resort!



Any tips for packing for a toddler?!

(Also - is it weird that I'm planning on bringing an inflatable pool toy/chair for Button so he can enjoy the "big" pool with us?  E said it's "like bringing snow to a ski slope" or something like that...)

couldn't skip...

I know it's Thursday (although thinking it's Wednesday, and then finding out it's Thursday is like finding free money...) but I wanted to squeeze in this Wardrobe Wednesday.

Because I feel really stylish.

=)

Pants - Kmart (found deep in a sale rack marked $6!!!)
Top - no recollection, most likely cheap... lol
shoes - Guess (from DSW - probably no more than $40, and not an exact image... couldn't find, but mine have a cool little twist on the toe part)

and a real-live work-bathroom shot!

In sleep

One night recently, I tiptoed into your room, your daddy at my side.

We do this nightly - this ritual of tucking you back under your blanket, of chasing away any lingering bad dreams that were waiting, of layering soft kisses across your brow...

Some nights you stir and shift, pulling off the blanket that we once again pull up your pajama-clad body.  Other nights, sleep has solidly claimed you and your soft snore continues uninterrupted. 

Once in awhile, your little blonde head picks up just an inch - your eyes in sleepy slits - and you let out a contented sigh as you settle back in with your bed buddies, a veritable jungle of monkeys, giraffes and elephants...

On the recent night I tiptoed into your room with your daddy, it was a night that you didn't stir as we watched your lips pucker, surely enjoying some sweets in a far-off dreamland. 

Yet, as we prepared to surrender you to sleep, as we shared our nightly sigh of contentment, you let out a breathy single word...

mommy...

With a slight smile, you called out my name in your sleep... and as I walked out of your nursery with that sweet sleepy sound on my ears, I left behind my heart, grasped so tightly in your little boy arms, right next to your monkey and giraffe...

Betrayed...

...By my own sister.

(Well, by my BIL to be exact...)

my first foray onto RhymesWith"SpaceLook" today, (April Fool's Day in case anyone forgot!) and on the verrrry top of my feed is the first thing I see:
The Joke, the one that only the original authors think is hilarious:

I hate the internet today...



(on a side note - Button had diarrhea  from last Tuesday to Saturday, and so of course the natural chain of events is that I would get smacked with it just when I think I can sound the All Clear... i.e. I had to leave work early yesterday...)
But I am thankfully back to normal this morning (OH SO THANKFULLY!) because it's FW and we need to get back on our EOD schedule!!!
OPKs still fading in as of this morning, stopping at the store later tonight for more POM juice, prenatal vitamins and pineapple core!