Monday, March 9, 2015

The truth

We're rounding the corner into the final stretch of this cycle at 1(to 2)DPOish...
(it's "ish" because I think I Ov. on the actual day of a +OPK when considering CP and CM as well, and fertilityfriend seems to think I O the day after...) I've been drinking POM juice the last week or so (to theoretically thicken up uterus lining for a nice fluffy bed), green tea daily for the past few days (to, again theoretically, increase CM to catch those swimmers), and this morning threw some pineapple core pieces into my rare fruit smoothie (supposedly the pineapple core aids implantation... notice all of these "tips and tricks" are really just theories, and "supposedlies" - but how could I not?)

Aside from all that good stuff, I somehow let FW creep up very quickly this month - we have only had one BD during FW.


According to my O time frame, it was on O-1, so good timing.  According to FertilityFriend, it was on O-2, still decent timing.

But I still feel like chances are slim...

Yea, it "just takes only once!"  but I'm still somewhat kicking myself in the hiney for not BDing more... (Of course I can't help but draw parallels to Button's BFP cycle where we only BD twice - O-2 and O.  I remind myself that I can't know which "time" was "The Time" but it was one of them (and not a combined effort of both... lol) so if we had only had sex that one time (which ever one it was!) then it still would have been a BFP...)

And - but damn, it's hard to feel so concerned at 10:30 at night when, having fallen asleep on the couch after laundry and dusting and dishes and cooking and dinner clean-up, we then drag ourselves up to bed and when my mind flickers to, "oh hm probably should BD now, we might be getting near that time..." my sleepy-time persona is all, "yaaaaaawn there's always tomorrow... we're not that close or far into FW..." 
And so goes the vicious cycle...

I mean, and also - I O once in the early CD20s and all of a sudden I think I O late every month?! (Next cycle I'm definitely going to be much more on top of things...)

Last fall, when we/I thought ahead to TTC again, I envisioned just "seeing what developed" and being laissez-faire... I so wanted the processing of TFAS to be "laid back"with no cycle tracking and just "having fun" and having no idea when I O'd.  I envisioned a, "I'm not positive, but I'm pretty sure my period is late" (like, at least a few days!) and then a fabulously dark second line...

I don't think that's possible... I'm pretty sure that I will ever get "that"back.
I have tracked O for the last year so I at least know when to expect AF, and that's been very hard to turn off...
the night we did BD this cycle, I had realized that this was it - the FW was about to pass us by, and I wasn't letting the night end without a "Deposit" being made...

So, there'll be no,  oh hmmmm shouldn't I have gotten my period by now? I wonder if I'm pregnant!

It's still the scientific process it became during our TTCAL stage (the "desperate stage" - as I religiously temped EVERY MORNING at the same time, and religiously checked CP at the same time every day after thorough hand washing for 2.5 minutes, and never forgot to take an OPK twice daily for the 2 weeks around FW...)

But I have to admit - the BD the other night was pretty kick ass, so I guess we haven't completely lost all of the "Magic" yet...

(also coming up - A BuggyLIst revisit, a fabulous MakingThingsMonday on Tuesday (lol) and some ReadingList catchup!)


  1. Ha! I love that it was "kick ass!" Thank you also for your kind comments on my blog. It means a lot. Good luck with this cycle!

  2. Hopefully sex stays that much fun

  3. The "kick ass" BD makes me smile! You're right, it only takes once. I hope that you guys see that 2nd dark line THIS MONTH. I have to admit that your 2WW is almost as fun and exciting to watch as my 2WW, but probably better because I'm not thinking about it constantly when it's yours :)

    Wondfo's and their double edged sword. So cheap you could test daily. But the negatives totally burst your bubble so it doesn't seem worth it.